Sermon: Christ the King Sunday

Matthew 25:31-46:
31 ‘When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, then he will sit on the throne of his glory. ³²All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats, ³³and he will put the sheep at his right hand and the goats at the left. ³⁴Then the king will say to those at his right hand, “Come, you that are blessed by my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world; ³⁵for I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, ³⁶I was naked and you gave me clothing, I was sick and you took care of me, I was in prison and you visited me.” ³⁷Then the righteous will answer him, “Lord, when was it that we saw you hungry and gave you food, or thirsty and gave you something to drink? ³⁸And when was it that we saw you a stranger and welcomed you, or naked and gave you clothing? ³⁹And when was it that we saw you sick or in prison and visited you?” ⁴⁰And the king will answer them, “Truly I tell you, just as you did it to one of the least of these who are members of my family, you did it to me.” ⁴¹Then he will say to those at his left hand, “You that are accursed, depart from me into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels; ⁴²for I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, ⁴³I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not give me clothing, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.” ⁴⁴Then they also will answer, “Lord, when was it that we saw you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not take care of you?” ⁴⁵Then he will answer them, “Truly I tell you, just as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me.” ⁴⁶And these will go away into eternal punishment, but the righteous into eternal life.’

            There are 156 Sundays in the lectionary cycle and if I ranked them from 1-156, with 1 being the easiest to preach on my first Sunday and 156 being the hardest, this Gospel would come in at 156. This is one of those readings where I sometimes wonder if the correct response is “the Gospel of the Lord?”

            Is this really good news?

            If the choice is sheep or goats, all of us want to think that we are sheep. But then worry starts to creep into the back of our minds. Sometimes we don’t act very much like sheep; sometimes we act like goats. I know a thing or two about goats, as a Minnesota Twins fan and a recovering Vikings fan. In the sports world you can go from chosen one to goat in a matter of minutes, just ask Joe Mauer. In life, it sometimes happens even quicker.

I’ve only known some of you for a week and for many of you today is the first day so perhaps I’m being presumptuous, but seeing that you are all human beings I think I can assume that, if you are honest with yourselves, you probably could see yourself as both sheep and goat. Some days you give to the poor, some days you welcome the stranger, and some days you are just in a bad mood and want nothing to do with anyone. We could break it up into smaller periods of time and see that some minutes of your life have been dedicated to taking care of the sick and then some minutes later to looking out for yourself. In fact, so many actions we take are both good and bad; in the real world, right and wrong is often hard to figure out.

A professor of mine once said that you sin even when you give to charity, because we could have given that money to somewhere else and you chose not to. His point was not that you should not give but that you can’t get away with calling yourself a sheep because of your gift. You don’t get to label yourself; that is Christ’s job.

I was reminded of my professor’s brazen statement this past Wednesday, which was Give to the Max Day in Minnesota, a day meant to encourage giving money to non-profits across the state. I looked on the website: there were 3,181 different non-profit groups asking for gifts on that day. Most of which were causes I could see myself getting behind. So what do I do? Do I give to my seminary or my synod, Second Harvest or Feed My Starving Children, the Wildcat Sanctuary or the North American Bear Center? Or do I look at the bank account and think, Man, I really can’t afford to give anything until my first paycheck.

We all make these kinds of financial decisions. I talked with the seventh-graders at Confirmation on Wednesday about times when they had enough—when they had an abundance—or not enough—a scarcity. Twelve and thirteen year-olds are thinking about these things, so surely all of you are. The decision to give of yourself sometimes isn’t even a conscious choices. Everyone of us has hurt somebody without even realizing it.

So here we are—left with a Gospel reading that tells us some of us are sheep and some of us are goats, but none of us really know. And that, strangely enough, is where the good news starts. In a world that places value on knowing things, this is a lesson that says, “No. You don’t know; you cannot know.” The sheep are as confused as the goats. “When was it that we saw you hungry and gave you food?” they ask. “When was it that we welcomed you, a stranger, or gave you clothing? When did we visit you in prison?” The sheep don’t know. It is not in their hands and it never was.

This passage from Matthew is so very different from the entire flow of the Gospels that it makes sense only when we know what is to come—the death, the resurrection and eternal life. As Robert Capon puts it, “Jesus is interested in the least, the last, the lost, the lonely, the little and the dead.” If you’re not in one of those categories, tough luck. The good news is that you are all in one of those categories: some of us are on our way to pitching the perfect game. And that is what this parable points us toward. It does not allow us to see ourselves as sheep; the Gospel only shows you the Shepherd. As Capon again puts it, “[Jesus] is the Love that will not let us go. If anybody can sort it out, he can; if he can’t nobody else will. Trust him, therefore. And trust him now. There is nothing more to do.”

You don’t need to worry about being a sheep or a goat, at the right hand or the left. All you are called to do is act in dumb trust. That is all that sheep do; they are not very smart. And neither are we. So give. Give of yourself: your time, money, resources, the shirt off your back, whatever it is that you want, but don’t do it to know that you are saved. You can’t know. The more you think about it, the more uncertain you will become. Instead, do it because you cannot help it; do it because you believe in a God that is working for the redemption of the whole world, because you believe in a God that died on a cross for all of our half-hearted attempts to become sheep.

There really is nothing more to do.

Amen.

99 or 1?

I am the 99%... and the 1%?

If you're talking about the United States then I'm firmly in the 99, but if you're talking about the world then I'm in the 1. I want to help those in need, but I am as guilty as any of assuming that I'm on the side of inequality. The Gospel text for this Sunday (Matthew 25:31-46) is one that might put this all into perspective if only we'd read it for what it is. Neither the sheep nor the goats know who they are. The goats ask when it was that they saw Christ hungry, thirsty, a stranger, naked and in jail... but the sheep do the same. Neither know if they are on the right or the left. Neither know if they are the 99 or the 1.

All we have is action in blind faith. There is injustice worth our protest, but be careful that you aren't more worried about your position than about justice. Only the Shepherd knows the sheep from the goats. I am the 100; I am qualified for no further separation. I can't get away from my sometimes implicit, often explicit guilt. I act in blind faith, knowing little, praying for the big and the small; the ones whom Jesus came to save.

Seminary Conversations: The Response

Nearly a week ago I posted a piece reflecting on three conversations I had with students at Luther Seminary. In the following days I was deluged with comments (pro and con) about the truth or fiction about what I wrote. The most encouraging news, however, was that I don't feel like I need to synthesize those responses because I keep hearing that these discussions are now happening. So, rather than re-hashing what many of you are already talking about I have a couple parting suggestions to get you on your way.

1. Students need to take ownership of their seminary experience

The responses I heard centered largely on the distance felt on the seminary campus. Students don't feel comfortable--or even safe. This is a problem, but it is not one so big that students themselves can't work to fix it. Have the conversations. Don't gossip. Be respectful to one another and treat each other like the future church leaders that you are. If somebody needs help give it to them, and be honest, even when that is the hardest thing to do.

Along those lines...

2. Be open to personal critique

I would hazard to guess that the real reason why students primarily feel unsafe has nothing to do with physical safety or institutional coldness (read: your candidacy committee). Instead, I think the biggest obstacle to safety are the walls that students throw up in the face of one another. You are not perfect. You confess it in chapel (if you attend... and you probably should). So, don't take negative comments as a personal attack. Ditch the God-complex; it won't serve you well in the seminary and will kill you in the parish.

3. Your theology doesn't work all the time. That's good.

If you had God figured out that would be a pretty puny God, hardly deserving of your worship. So, get off your high theological horses and listen to somebody who says things with which you don't agree. This goes for people who have so-called "accepting" beliefs as well. Feminists and GLBT-promoters can be just as narrow-sighted with their opinions as fundamentalists.

4. The true measure of your worth to the community is not what you say but what you do

The differences between academic and practical matters are never so clear as in the seminary. At the same time that you are learning about preaching methods and atonement theories, you are encountering fellow students in need of a word of grace and peace. What you believe about God is not nearly as important as what you do in God's name. This is not works righteousness--it is love of the neighbor.

I sometimes think we use the wrong word to talk about eternal life with God, because salvation encompasses not just eternity but our wellness in the here and now. So we use the phrase "eternal salvation" to the detriment of our physical, emotional and even spiritual well-being. If we want to talk about salvation in a kind of holistic way I think we had better start acting like the Christian leaders we envision ourselves to be.

All of this is to say that the seminary is a complicated place with so many facets that seem outside of our control. So is life. My first piece may have come across as aimed at the institution and this one at the students, but the reality is that these should be one and the same. Institutions are nothing but the people of which they are made up. Revolution may be what's needed, but it's a revolution in the mentality of the student body, the staff and faculty, and the administration. It starts with you. I think the conversation that has started is a useful one. Keep having it. Learn from it. Grow into it.

Then, as we move toward Advent we have the same hope of Mary and the hymn writer that "the world is about to change."

Worry and new life

“Are you sure you’ll be ok? It’s very cold out. I’m worried about you.”

On the one hand these are nice words to hear; it’s good to know that somebody cares enough about you to worry about you. Worry is a sign of love. I know. My mom worries about me a lot, and she loves me a lot. These are good things, though sometimes it goes a tad too far. Today she had to drop me off at a coffee shop on her way to work while I waited for my car to get winterized. The coffee shop was about ¾ mile from the body shop. It was cold, sort of, and so she worried.

Her worries cause me to worry that something really will happen to me. It's not that I worry about myself, rather I worry about what would happen to her if something did happen to me. I think I understand the risks of living. I think I understand the fear that lies behind the worry.

I could die. I could. Any number of things could befall me. I could have an accident while hiking or fishing; I could freeze on this walk (unlikely, I think); I could have a car accident (did you know that more people have died in car crashes than in all wars in the history of the world? Think about that!); I could have an undetectable medical condition. Who knows?

The reality is that any of us can be gone in an instant. I don’t want to sound morbid but you could be gone tomorrow (I surely hope you’ll be around a good long while)--hence the ubiquitous songs about living like you were dying. I quite enjoy life and I certainly don’t want to lose those closest to me, but if I were to suddenly cease to be please know that I understood the risks. I may not be the risk-taker that some people are, but I do enjoy going out on a limb, playing Frisbee in the rain, hiking in a thunderstorm, wandering in the woods. Something could happen someday… or I could die at the age of 85 after a long life of playing it safe.

The fullness of a life is only marginally dependent on its duration.

Death is real. To my mind, the best way to honor those whose lives are cut short is to embrace the newness of life. Death leads to life. Embrace new things. Love one another. Be open. Laugh. All of this honors life. So excuse me if I don’t drown myself in worry; excuse me if I don’t wallow in the pain of those who have gone before. I choose a different way to honor life: I choose to walk down strange paths, to take a chance, to say what I mean and mean what I say, to be real.

After all, death, like an hourglass, is turned on its head finally by the same God who has been the God of life all along.

Three conversations on the brokenness of seminary

In the past week I've sat down with three different people in three different phases of their seminary education. These conversations were unscripted and unexpected. One was a seminary newbie (a Junior), one had been here a year and a half (a Middler), and one was post-Internship (a Senior). What surprised me was that they had many of the same frustrations and saw the same problems with their seminary experience. So, in this medium, I'm hoping to draw together their thoughts and feelings in a way that is both helpful and true to the gravity of the situation, which is (I believe) severe.

I wish my seminary education was more practical.

I heard the same thing from all three. Nobody was complaining about learning theology, but they wanted to make it mean something. The lens of systematic theology to view the world as pastor is a failure; not because systematic theology is a failure but because the language it gives us as pastors is limiting to the experience of the people we serve. None of the people I talked with thought we should do away with systematic theology but each thought it sent a funny message that our systematics faculty outnumbered our pastoral care faculty by more than 2-1. One told me that they approached a seminary faculty member about a class on church finance. "Nobody will take that," she was assured. "Bull----," she told me. And I tend to agree. Classes like these are fit into January weekends when students are on Cross Cultural trips or in days filled with other required classes. What's more important, really, is that any seminary professor could feel that students don't want something practical. We crave practical!

I wish we felt safe at the seminary.

In one conversation, I was relayed the story of what happened in a Pastoral Care class with Dr. Latini when she asked the question, "Do you feel safe at seminary?" The class sat in silence... and nobody said yes. On the surface-level we all know that something we say can, and perhaps will, be used against us in the process of becoming a pastor--this is a constant and insidious threat that inhibits the learning process. However, I think it goes even deeper than this. When we don't know our neighbors it leads to mistrust and defensiveness. Unfortunately, seminary is a place where the defenses almost never come down.

The administration has sold the students out for the future.

This is the hardest to talk about because it could feel like a personal attack. So let me be clear: I don't feel like anybody in the administration of the seminary or the church proper set out to hurt the students--in fact, I think quite the opposite. Nevertheless, the idea that we are a forward-thinking seminary is troubling when you count the collateral damage that has been left along the way. Let me explain.

Luther Seminary has prided itself on the image of an institution that understands the economic realities of being the "declining church" in the 21st century. The administration has taken measures to ensure that the financial stability of the seminary is not withered by the markets and declining membership in the ELCA as a whole. For this they should be applauded. Forward-thinking is never easy and requires an eye on both the current needs and what will make the institution sustainable in the long-run.

The problem is this: in order to preserve the future, the seminary has instituted policies that are based on a principle of scarcity that makes more than a modicum of adaptation to the needs of the church in the world exceedingly challenging. Some of this is almost unavoidable. The kind of wholesale change that the student body would largely like to see (an increased influence in the areas of Pastoral Care, Worship, and Church Administration, among other more day-to-day realities in the parish) means that the status quo cannot remain unchanged. There has to be a demographic shift in the faculty. Nobody wants this--and for good reason. I don't want anybody to lose their job. I simply adore many of the Systematics faculty, and even if I didn't it's no small matter to consider measures that cut at the heart of their vocations. But here's the problem...

We've had three suicides in three years... and somehow nothing has changed.

Seminarians have the same problems as people in the church, because--and I can't believe this isn't more obvious to everybody--we are the people in the church. We spend too much time detailing the small way in which pastors are set apart from their flock at the cost of the whole self that is one and the same with all people of God.

Seminarians are hurting. And they are scared to say anything about it. Who do you talk to? Professors who have a vote in your graduation? Staff who are connected to the assignment process? Administrators and community members who have their hands in candidacy? Too often seminarians vent to the silence of Facebook or to the preoccupied ears of their peers who want to help but don't feel open themselves to pastoring one another.

The single greatest indictment of the seminary education is this: seminary students are not equipped to minister to one another.

So what's the fix?

I joked with my Senior friend and said, "Revolution." But maybe it's not such a joke. The problem is it's not going to happen. The system is perfectly self-perpetuating because students have learned to mistrust one another. They cling to particular professors and give others titles: "Systematicians," or "Feminists," or narrow-minded, or closed-minded. Dogmatic. Heretical. Students have hardly a minute to think about what God is doing in their neighbor's life because the defenses remain. What the student body needs is to see one another for who they truly are: sinners of Christ's own redeeming, yes, but more than that, Luther Seminary students are the future for the church-to-come. And we are the leaders who will lead this church out of the desert wilderness, but only if we see each other now as the gifts of God that we are.

Any change that will happen has to be student-led.

I don't want to preach in chapel because it is only an academic exercise.

My Senior friend hit a nerve here because I took the same stance my Senior year. I didn't preach because I didn't think it would be heard. But she got me thinking about what I would say if I did preach--what I could say to open the ears of a student body that's not listening. I realized finally all that I could say and it looks something like this:

What will it take for you to hear me? What will it take for you to stop speaking ill of this message in the halls and the cafeteria of this building? What can I say that you won't critique in ten minutes? Your ears must be filled with wax! The message from this pulpit has been one and same in all the years I've walked these halls: Christ has died for you. Hallelujah. Now stop acting like this is the small word and the big word is my theological move to get there. It's not. What little weight my words carry is a drop of water in the ocean that is the salvation you have in Christ. So sit down, shut up, and listen. Christ has died for you. Hallelujah.
Amen.

The First Semi-Annual Fantasy Box Office Draft

There are some small things that just make life more fun. I'm not a huge gambler, but putting a few dollars on something that's worth the entertainment value alone is cool with me. This is the best way I can explain the allure of our Fantasy Box Office league--a league designed to draft movies that are going to be successful at the box office.

The general idea of the league is this: get movies that people go see and then you will score points over a four month period--November to February in this case. You get 10 points for a #1 grossing movie in a given week, 9 points for #2, down to 1 point for #10. There were five of us and for this first draft we decided to stay small-scale: we drafted only six movies each. Each of us was given a $100 in fake auction cash to spend on our six movies and whoever bid the most got the flick.

The following is a pick-by-pick account of our first draft.

Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 1
To Pipp for $48
I started off the nominations with this, curious to see who would overspend. The way our league works means that this will in all likelihood be the number 1 movie, but I figured somebody was likely to spend too much. In the end, the price was just about right.

The Descendants
To Pipp for $10
Pipp threw us for a curve on this one. He probably should have just nominated it for $1 because there was absolutely no interest. This is the only movie drafted with a limited release. At this point in the draft I started to salivate at the deals that were coming if this movie went for $10!

Happy Feet Two
To Jeph for $35
A bit overpriced for my liking. This movie opens against Twilight with The Muppets and Hugo coming in the next week. It will stay in the top 10 for awhile but I can't see it staying top 5 for more than three weeks and at this price I was happy to pass.

Mission: Impossible - Ghost Protocol
To Kate for $30
I was glad to see Kate get involved and decided keenly to not bid against her. This is a good, fair price for a movie that will do well, though it goes up against some stiff competition at the end of December.

War Horse
To Kate for $20
This is a classic case of taking the "hometown team." Kate wants this movie because it's about a horse and she'll want to go see it. She overpaid for it, in my opinion, but I'm glad she's content with movies she could actually enjoy... some of which I certainly don't have.

Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows
To Frank for $35
I'm not going to lie: I needed this movie. It's going to do very well, and I told myself before the draft I wanted one of the three top movies. Twilight didn't happen and I wasn't going to bid against Kate for Mission Impossible. This is a sure thing at a reasonable price.

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo
To Pipp for $37
A woeful overbid in my opinion. Pipp now had three movies and $5 left to spend. Worse still, I wasn't going to spend more than $10 (at most) for this movie. It's opening against Mission Impossible, The Adventures of Tintin and War Horse, with Sherlock Holmes and Alvin and the Chipmunks in its second week. Mark it down: this movie never goes higher than 5th on the weekly charts. Still, I'm going to see it, and I'm going to like it. (A clear case where a movie will be much better than the number of people seeing it suggests)

Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked
To Steve for $25
Steve needed a top-rate movie, having been shutout to this point, and this was about what was left. Really this was about what he should have paid for this, so not much to see here.

The Muppets
To Kate for $25
Again Kate goes for a movie she'll like, but this time she got it for the right price. It has an outside shot of opening #1 (though it's Twilight's second week), and it should stay in the top 10 until about Christmas.

We Bought a Zoo
To Kate for $12
I don't buy that this movie will do well, even though it's been promoted like crazy. I would have thrown out a flier on $1 or $2 so I consider this a little spendy, but with the feel-good strategy in place this was a must-have for Kate.

Red Tails
To Frank for $5
I made a bit of a miscalculation here. Now don't get me wrong, I'm very happy to have this movie for a paltry $5, but I probably could have done even better. There was a movie I had rated higher which went undrafted (we'll get to that later). Still, I think this movie will be successful and has a decent chance to be a top 3 movie for a couple of weeks in the desolate January movie-scape.

New Years Eve
To Jeph for $15
It's hard to draft a movie that looks this bad, so props to Jeph for pulling the trigger. I say this because it has bankability, a cavalcade of stars, and you know it will do well because people are dumb and go to movies that have a bunch of people they recognize. This is such a movie and I think it opens #1 before quickly falling off when word gets out that it is no good (and Sherlock Holmes and Alvin come out next week).

Hugo
To Steve for $9
I know Steve was excited to get this at this price, but honestly I'd rather have Red Tails. There just isn't that much upside here. I think it opens at #4 and stays there for two weeks before slowly sliding down. That said, this is another movie I'd like to go see.

Arthur Christmas
To Jeph for $7
I almost goofed and drafted this. I was very, very, very thankful Jeph came back over the top. Really, this should have been a $1-3 movie. Honestly, I still don't know why I bid $5 on it. Seriously. I must have had a brief stroke or something.

Big Miracle
To Frank for $13
Thankfully, I recovered quickly and got the steal of the draft. Even though this league only runs through the end of February that will be just enough for Big Miracle to have four scoring weeks. I don't think it drops out of the top five in that time. If it doesn't, I have this as the fifth highest scoring movie (behind Twilight, Sherlock Holmes, Mission Impossible and the Adventures of Tintin); for $13 that's a steal.

The Vow
To Kate for $10
I was stoked for Kate to get this. It has Rachel McAdams and Channing Tatum and it opens before Valentine's Day. Can you say assured #1? The only problem is that it only has three weeks in this format. Still, a bargain at this price.

Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy
To Jeph for $6
Honestly, not much to say here. Looks like a great movie, but I doubt it does well at the box office.

Ghost Rider Spirit of Vengeance
To Steve for $15
See Tinker Tailor, except the exact opposite. This will be bad, but people will be desperate for movies at the end of February and this is all you've got... but we've only got two weeks of it and Steve will only just get his money's worth if it finishes #1 both weeks, which (unfortunately for American intelligence) it probably will.

The Adventures of Tintin
To Jeph for $26
I was happy to at least push the bidding up on this one. Still, I can't help but feel that Jeph might have gotten a very good deal here. Tintin seems likely to open at #3, but I wouldn't be shocked if it stays in the top 10 for a lengthy six weeks just behind Mission: Impossible all the time. Considering MI went for $30, this is a good price.

Joyful Noise
To Kate for $3
Not a bad way to fill out her roster. This is a solid choice. People will see it because it opens in January and it's going up against not much, well... except Beauty and the Beast in 3D...

Immortals
To Frank for $5
I have to be honest. I wasn't looking to get this movie, but for this price? Absolutely! Especially when...

Jack and Jill
To Frank for $6
...I can handicap the Immortals pick with another movie opening that week. I should have #1 and #2 this first week and even though I got mocked a little because Twilight and Happy Feet Two come out the next week I think there will be some staying power here (even if I wouldn't be caught dead seeing this movie). For the record, I have both of these flicks staying in the top 10 for five weeks. If so, this is a steal.

Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace 3D
To Steve for $3
Now this is a wild card pick. Are people going to go see pod racing in 3D? Or are they going to remember that this is one of the crappy new Star Wars?


J Edgar
To Jeph for $2
It strikes me now that Jeph has an odd collection of movies: the animated (Happy Feet, Tintin, and Arthur Christmas), the likely awful (New Years Eve), and the Oscar contenders (Tinker Tailor and J Edgar). What's more interesting, however, is that all of his movies come out before New Years. So basically he's going to be done scoring by the middle of January. We'll see if that hurts him...

Underworld Awakening
To Frank for $36
This is a case where budgeting better may have produced better results, but the truth is that I was so excited to get Immortals and Jack and Jill at the prices I did that I had $36 left to spend on a single movie and this was the top of my list. Once again, I handicap Red Tails with another movie coming out that weekend. Just watch Haywire finish #1 that weekend... wait no, that won't happen.

Man on a Ledge
To Pipp for $1
Wait, Pipp got this for $1? Seriously. Where was Steve and his $48 to stop this? Good things come to those who wait, I suppose, and Pipp got a serious steal here. The end of January is a tough time to parse, but if I were to bet I guess this opens #1 and could score until the end of the competition.

Chronicle
To Steve for $3
Hmm... not what I would have picked here with some of the choices still on the board, but this should score alright.

The Woman in Black
To Pipp for $1
Definitely a wildcard. Daniel Radcliffe could be a draw, but there seem to be many safer picks still on the board.

Beauty and the Beast 3D
To Steve for $45
OK, so Steve didn't budget well, but this is a great last pick. Tremendous upside. If it has similar success to the Lion King re-release we're looking at a top five overall pick -OR- it could be in theaters a week... 

Iron Lady
To Pipp for $1
This is questionable to me mainly because of what is left on the board. Contraband will get points. It might even be a #1 movie. This movie won't. Seriously. Also, we left The Grey and Safe House out of the league, as well as This Means War and Journey 2: The Mysterious Island.

If there's one trend here it's that we're overpricing current movies at the cost of January and February flicks. There's always inherent risk in going for those movies further out on the horizon. For one, the release date could get pushed back (not good) or they might just be a crappy movie, but at the price some of those went (or didn't go at all), there is tremendous value left on the table.

So that's it. I'll post some results as we go along. If anybody is interested in joining the league starting in March let me know. We'll take all comers (within reason), and look forward to the next season of March-May!

Bullying and Survivor

I just finished this week's episode of Survivor and felt the need to offer a few quick thoughts. The first is this: Survivor has all of the insidiousness of other reality shows and from time to time it comes through full force. The rest of this season has the potential to be ugly. You don't need to know much about the show to understand what's happening here; all you need to do is look at a high school cafeteria.

I say this in no small part because, while portraying itself as a game, Survivor has never escaped being personal. Every season the contestants get assigned to tribes arbitrarily and yet by the end of their time in the game they feel as if any breach of the tribal boundaries should warrant something akin to a death sentence. How it gets to that point is something that systems analysts or cultural anthropologists will have to explain. I am more interested in what it says about us as people.

Today, the stereotypical nerd, Cochran, a Harvard law student and all-around smart guy, decided it was in his best interest to go against his tribe. This was a dumb decision for one reason: Because the people he is going to vote out now hate him and everybody treats it as their duty to make certain that people who vote them out don't win. Putting that aside, what Cochran did is essentially what millions of kids fail to do every day of their lives: he stood up to a bully. Jim is a straight-up jerk; Keith isn't much better. Ozzy is kind of like the cool kid, Whitney the cheerleader/hanger-on, etc. Cochran was in a crappy situation and decided to get out of it.

What was Jim's response? The first word out of his mouth was: coward.

Right, Jim. That's what I think of when I see a guy being bullied finally stand up to the bullies. Coward. Brandon's response was apropos: "That's what you get for treating him like that."

My frustration with Survivor and the whole reality genre is unfortunately that it is all too real. There is a prevailing cultural ideology that sees behavior like this as acceptable. Cochran never had a chance to win this game because he was placed with players who decided from the start that he isn't the kind of player worthy of $1 million. Maybe in a different group a person like him would have a chance, but not with this group. All too sadly this is where many people find themselves in lives far more real than network television can ever display.

I'm not sure I have a solution to this. I want to stand up to people like Jim and say, "Coward." But even more I want to stand up to Cochran and say, "Congrats. You aren't winning $1 million, but there are some things far more valuable."