Sunday, December 21, 2014

Joseph and the importance of just showing up

Scripture: Matthew 1:1-25

Whenever we read about Joseph (the father of Jesus) in the Bible, which admittedly is not often because he only appears in first two chapters of Matthew and even less in Luke, I am reminded of a quote from the 1998 movie, Simon Birch, where one of the boys, Eddie, gloats after being cast as Joseph in the Christmas pageant. He’s pretty full of himself until Simon, the little misfit title character, says, “It's the Virgin Mary, Eddie. What does Joseph have to do with anything?”
Right. What does Joseph have to do with anything?
This really is the question. Joseph is just along for the ride; in fact, it’s his fault they need to make this journey to Bethlehem in the first place. What does Joseph have to do with anything? I mean, how many lines does he get in the Christmas pageant? How many songs are written about him? Nobody cares! And I suppose that’s natural and it’s even kind of funny… until we consider that perhaps Joseph does have a role to play, that, in fact, this story of Jesus’ birth hinges on adoption… and it centers around naming… both of which are incredibly powerful and both of which are Joseph’s job.
I bet most people would say that these verses in Matthew are about the Virgin birth, which is true in part, but I would hazard to guess that we say that primarily because that’s controversial, and our eyes tend to focus on sex if it’s to be found anywhere in the text. If there’s one verse out of one hundred that has to do with sex we’ll pick it out as the most important, because it tends to be one of our big hang-ups. For example, I can all but guarantee that even though this sermon has nothing to do with sex and I’m not going to mention it again after this moment it will show up in a couple of sermon notes. We get so hung up on Virgin birth stuff that we tend to miss the rest of what’s going on altogether. This is a story about Joseph staying in the picture, being the adoptive father of the Son of God, and it’s about the power of naming. It’s Joseph to whom the name of Emmanuel is given, not Mary, though, being the typical guy that he is, he apparently wasn’t listening to the angel very closely because instead of Emmanuel he went with “Jesus.”
Joseph is also important because of his lineage. The first reading today with that overly long list of descendents connects Jesus with the heroes of biblical history. That lineage runs through Joseph. None of those connections exist without Joseph, which is kind of funny if you stop and think about it because it means that Jesus was not actually a flesh and blood descendant of David or Abraham or any of the others. He is only an adoptive descendant of that line. If Joseph goes, so does Jesus’ primary connection with the Old Testament. Jesus’ flesh and blood lineage is through the more-anonymous Mary.
So why does any of this matter?
Well, tradition tends to forget Joseph. The Bible certainly doesn’t dwell on him much, but, on the other hand, Matthew spends the better part of his first chapter making certain that people know that Jesus’ long lineage of royal blood is dependent on him. Then, Matthew goes out of his way again to demonstrate that Joseph, in spite of the cultural pariah he would be for marrying a girl who was already pregnant, sticks with it. In all the veneration that we do of Mary in this season it was always her child; there was no doubt about that. For Joseph, however, that was in question, and still he stayed.
That simple act might not seem like much to us today—we could assume that Jesus was going to be Jesus no matter the earthly father he was given—but the truth is that we simply don’t know. All we know is that without Joseph he doesn’t even get the name. There is no “Jesus”—no “God saves”; no Emmanuel—no “God with us.” When God created in Genesis he did it by speaking a name. He spoke stars and there were stars; he spoke trees and there were trees… water, sun, moon, he spoke it all into being. And so the angels give to Joseph sign that he, too, is part of the creation of this Christ-child. He gets to give him a name, which is the nearest thing he could do to being his true father.
While it’s certainly true that Mary knew Jesus in a way that Joseph could not, it’s also true that Joseph’s commitment to stay meant that Jesus had opportunities he never would have had with only a mother. Of course we can play the God-preordained-all-this-from-the-beginning-of-time card. We can play the game of minimizing human volition in favor of God moving the pawns, but if our lives matter at all—if our wills matter at all today—then scripture begs us to consider Joseph as a hero, because Joseph had the freedom to go this way or that and yet he stuck it out, changing the course of human history.
           With that said, I hesitate to make Joseph’s decision out to have any wider implications for our morality today. I am pretty certain that most of us will not have to decide whether to stay with a wife impregnated by God. This is clearly a unique situation. But I do think the mere fact that we relegate Joseph to a footnote in the stories of Jesus’ birth shows something about us: we tend to undervalue those who do an astoundingly good job of showing up. Joseph’s ministry to Mary was simply to be there, and that matters. Being there at the birth of the child mattered. It always matters.
            We are consistently under-aware of how important it is that individuals in our lives are just there until the moment of crisis when we need them—not to make it right, not even to say a word, just to be there. If you think that the Immaculate Conception was not a moment of crisis in Mary’s life you are oblivious. She needed Joseph. As much as we like to imagine the angels coming down and being her primary source of comfort nothing in scripture suggests that angels have anything like that effect on people. Pretty much every example we have of angels coming down in the Bible is accompanied by people going all, “Holy sweet Jesus, Hallelujah!” and averting their eyes for fear of the fiery brimstone and the laser eyes that they imagine that they have. In spite of the utter cuteness we parade before you each year at the Christmas pageant, angels are fearsome, terrifying, overwhelming creatures. None of them were singing “Hark the Herald Angels Sing,” let alone “Silent Night.” Mary had about as much chance of being comforted by the angels as your grandmother has of being comforted by death metal. That’s not how any of this works!
            Mary didn’t need angels to scare the bejesus out of her, and she didn’t need barn animals to keep her warm and cozy. We romanticize the heck out of Jesus’ birth when the truth is that none of it was comfortable. What Mary needed was Joseph. Of all possible people in the world she needed Joseph.
            I’m not suggesting that Mary needed Joseph because she wasn’t strong enough to do it on her own—please, please don’t hear this as suggesting that women need men to be strong for them (or if you do hear it that way definitely don’t tell my wife)—and neither am I suggesting that Joseph’s role was more important or even somewhat equivalent with Mary’s. Instead, I’m merely saying that we tend to undervalue how important it is to just be there—at births, at deaths, at big events in peoples’ lives, and even just day-to-day. The Lutheran pastor and writer, Nadia Bolz-Weber, claims that Mary Magdalene is the “patron saint of just showing up” and I want to suggest that Joseph is her male equivalent. Nobody shows up as importantly as Joseph.
            If there’s a wider lesson here I think it is that: just show up. We place so much importance as a society on being an expert, on knowing everything, on having our act together, but none of that really matters. Not when a person needs you. They need you to just be there. You don’t need to fix it. You’re not God. Joseph couldn’t undo the pregnancy; he couldn’t assure Mary that they wouldn’t be shunned or rejected by their families. All he could do was to be there. And it was enough. So it is for most of us. Just show up. It will make a world of difference.
            Amen.

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