Friday, April 19, 2019

The mystery of communion



            I don’t remember the first time I took communion. I vaguely remember something about classes—maybe I even learned something, but if I did, it’s long flown away—but I suspect, when I first took communion, I couldn’t actually have explained a single thing about what it was that I was doing. I suspect this is the same with most who come forward to the rail. What is communion? A mystery, we might say.
            Whatever our theology, and Martin Luther wrote volumes on this subject, all we really have from scripture is Jesus saying, “Take, eat; this is my body… drink from it, all of you, this is my blood…” Paul adds directions to that in his letters, but, really, they aren’t much clearer. What we have is an open-ended sacrament.
            I’ve gone to seminary and led my share of first communion classes, so I can tell you now what Luther’s Small Catechism says about communion—namely, that is gives forgiveness of sins, life, and salvation—but those words telling us about what communion is pale in comparison to the experience of what it does. This is not something to be understood with your head; it’s something that should be felt deep inside of you. It’s meaning is not in its logic but in its mysteriousness.
            But practical matters get in the way and eventually we have logical questions, like “Who gets to commune?” Is it members of the church? Is it members of our denomination? Is it all Christians? Is it all people? “And what age?” Is it from the first moment a baby can eat solid food? Is it six? Eight? Ten? Twelve? Eighteen? If it’s only when you understand it, then I suspect the answer is never, because what hope do any of us have to put the experience into words? For that matter, “How often should we commune?” Every day? Every Sunday? Every other Sunday? Once or twice a year?
Jesus doesn’t answer these things. We can intuit some sense of right practice and feel it deeply, but the open-endedness of communion has made this extremely difficult to pin down, and I suspect that many churches who do it very differently nevertheless do it very faithfully. For me, the reason communion is hard to pin down is because it is a means of grace—and means of grace are free, and unmerited, and don’t stand up to any of the rules we construct around them. They defy our legalism.

            So, we struggle together to find common ground. I believe differently about it that many of you—probably most of you. This is good and fine, because communion is deep and mysterious, and it is one area of our lives where our thoughts and feelings should be open to moving along with the Holy Spirit. The altar is a place where we should be moved.
When I interned out in Oregon, my supervisor told me that he had a change of heart at one point in his ministry when a child, three years old or so, reached out to him asking for the bread. The child’s parent quickly grabbed their hands to hold them back. I’ve seen this so many times in my ministry as well. It’s the most natural thing in the world for the child to want to partake and parents to want their child to learn proper etiquette and patience. But the thing my supervisor realized—that I also believe to be true—is that since communion is a means of grace, it is one place where nobody should be rejected, and that child knew what it meant to be left out of the community of faith.
Now, I can certainly understand when we talk about teaching children the virtue of waiting with patience for meaningful things; it’s just that, to me, communion isn’t the thing we should be waiting on. Confirmation, yes. Communion, perhaps not. The irony is that I tend to think many kids get it better than we do anyway, even if they don’t get the conventions right, and even if they are grumpy, or loud, or fail to show the reverence we wish they would.
I don’t remember my first communion, so I can’t tell you that story, but I do remember Natalie’s, and, today, I want to share that with you, because for me it was an eye-opener on what it means to experience grace.
We were at a friend’s wedding last year in South Dakota. Natalie was being fussy—really, a terror—and I had removed her from the sanctuary for most of the wedding. She was running around, not paying any attention, and doing all the kid things that drive parents crazy. The service had gone on for quite some time when I managed to get her back in the sanctuary just before communion. She was sitting in my lap, a little fussy still until the pastor started the communion liturgy. At that moment, something shifted. She stared at the bread and the wine and I could tell she was thinking about it. Ultimately, she turned to me, and scowled, and said, “Why can’t I have that?”
I can tell you what I wanted to tell her. I wanted to say, “Because you’re a little terrorist who only wants it because you can’t have it!”
But I stopped, and I thought about what I believed about it, and I asked, “Do you want to have it?”
She nodded. And in the following three minutes we had the fastest first communion class in the history of church. But the truth is that this had been ongoing since the first time she came to the altar—from the first occasion where she put out her hands and I put nothing in it, because I knew the rules of the space, and I respect those rules. But this tension always hits me in the gut every time any kid—not just Natalie—comes forward for communion and does this… [open hands] and not jokingly, as some do it, but honestly, earnestly expecting something.
I think of Jesus, saying “Take eat; take drink,” and it was for his disciples, I know, but didn’t he just get done saying, “Let the children come to me.” And I don’t know the answer, but I do know grace, because I’ve seen it and it looked like this.
It looked like Natalie nodding along as I told her what communion was, as simply as I could explain it. This is Jesus’ body and blood, given for you. “It’s not really blood, is it?” she asked, because of course she did. “Well, it is still grape juice, but it is also his blood.” “How?” “I don’t know.”
And she nodded. And we got in line. She stuck out her hands and got the bread, and she held out her hands for the grape juice. And then we went back to our seats.
Since that day, every day we come to church, even as we are getting ready for church, she always asks, “Do I get to come forward today?” And I know what she means, and I’m sad when the answer is no, because, frankly, she’s still often terrible in church. She doesn’t always listen. She usually wants to do things that she shouldn’t be, or at least can’t always be doing, but communion is the one place where she experiences Jesus every single time—even when she’s grumpy, even when she doesn’t show the reverence I wish she would show.
As I think this Maundy Thursday about Jesus and that Last Supper, I’m astounded by the vastness of grace. Right practice is just a thing we do to try to be in community together as a body of Christ, but God’s grace is bigger than our practices. God’s grace is for us every day, no matter the walls we put up to keep it in check, and it never gets less special. Communion, at its heart, is the physical enactment of grace that we need to be reminded of so desperately again and again. So, I’ve given away my stance on all this, but at the end of the day, I don’t want my beliefs to make communion about different rules. I like rules around most things, but I’m careful about rules around this. This is Jesus’ gift for you, for me, for Natalie, and for all of us.
It’s still a mystery and will be a mystery for us always. It’s Christ’s body and blood, given and shed for us. It’s simply ours. So, come.

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